Friday, January 25, 2008

China so far Part 1,2 and 3

Ahhh yes, i am currently something like 53,001 Km in the Air, my breakfast is about to be delivered to my tray table
and i am feeling quite relaxed. Now for most people they get on a flight and sit in their assigned seat, but for me
I have flown way too many times to know that the best thing to do is, wait and attempt to get an empty row. The art is
not to get caught by having the real owner of said seats come, or to not get a flight attendant to realize what you're doing,
it's quite tricky but it's all about timing, word of advice, wait till the people coming slows down till you are almost certain
the door is closed, this solves the first problem, the second is to not draw attention to the act, go to the bathroom come out
and seat down while reading a lovely book, or the in-flight magazine. This helps make it seem this is definetly your seat.

Now if you see fellow seat snatchers, don't make a big stink but try to make the flight attendant remove them from your row,
i mean early bird gets the worm. So for me i never had to play that card, but the guy behind me got caught, and man did he look
like a douche, in fact it was pretty embarassing, the flght attendant really let him have it. this was all due to his going to
early and getting caught by the seat owner.

On this flight i managed to steal 3/4 seats, this guy came no joke 5 seconds before take off and stole the last one, but he
seemed content with his 1 seat, this made me wonder why didn't he just sit in his orginal seat...seriously. Anyways there I am
fully laid out on 3 seats while this guy has his 4th, now i waited till he slept because if he wanted the second seat i was
willing to give it to him, but he didn't and well, i'm an ass so i laid down. The art to sleeping on a plane is 3 things
Eye-mask, Ear buds (or Music player i.e. Ipod) and covering feet with covers. the covers they give are beyond light but, they
do make a difference when it comes to your feet.

Airplane food: not that bad, to be honest people really torn into them but seriously i quite enjoy it, I never had the fish,
part of me always fish the best thing to have on plane, if anyone has had the fish please tell if it is good,
if it is i shall try it on my next flight, i hope it is personally because i love fish.

Anyways Breakfast has arrived, so next time i crack this laptop open i will be in a whole new country!
take er easy

Part Two....
Yea i didn't think this thing was gonna have a part two but i finished my 554 page book and now need to Kill time,
so with that said i will give some updates, I have abandoned my 3 seat awkward tension filled ride to move back to my original
seat which had lost the two hippie couple that i was stuck next to. Let me explain, you see my flight had a small re-fuel and
drop off of some flyers in Bangkok(which i shall be seeing in a couple of days). Since the couple left, i felt that i would be
nice to observe Gorgeous Chinese Mountain range, this where i would post some pictures, but like the idiot I am, i forgot to
pack Batteries. So i will describe it, it's like chocolate macaroons popping out of the ground. Delicious!

I have actually done something that i said i hadn't earlier in this post, yes folks i ordered fish, the lady came asking
chicken or fish, and i said, nuts to this I am going to give it a go, and Fish was ordered. I wish they told me it was gonna
be spicy, that was a nice surprise. I actually enjoyed it, i felt they over sauced it, thus removing the flavour of the original
fish, but that is neither here or there. All in all fish is now a legit option.

I filled out the Custom Declaration card for Chinese Government, never have i ever felt like I was a hardcore Smuggler,
they asked if i had a Radio Transmitter, or Radio accepting device....I decided to go with the gut and say no, then i was asked
if i had material that was banned in China, I really forgot to check the list before leaving, i would guess probably, but i said
again the obvious choice, no. I followed the rule that most bored housewives use, fake it till you make it. Making it entails
being in my parents apartment in Ghangzhou. So far i Must say the Bangkok airport is BEYOND stunning, it had this cool look to
it, again no batteries, my bad. Hey but in a fun fact i forgot to pack my boxers because i didn't want to wake up beattie while
i was packing, so i am gonna have to make this one pair last! Then again i am heading to china, i am pretty sure i can find a
pair of boxers...

Well the book i just finished was quite good, it is called Jpod by: Doug Coupland, it was packed full of humour and modern time
references. It was split into three parts and before each part there would be almost a psychotic rant, it was fun to read, but
hard to follow...again it is a rant. Plenty of pages were filled with numbers and all sorts of randomness. I recommend it
it's about a group of Videogame developers and all the shit they go a whole lot of randomness, remember it is a something has to go down. The downfall of the book was...and i have a feeling a lot of his work is like this...but
very self-referential, fuck he is a character at one point in the book, and often comments on his own work and stuff like that.
I don't mind people being self referential but I do feel people do it for a cheap laugh, and frankly...It's just not clever.
That said the book is highly-recommended and in all flys by. Next up is The Alchemist...
I think now is as good as ever to end this B-log.
so for the second time
Take er Easy.

Part 3 (aka airport and Day 1)

Well i almost got booted from China, if you know me and my luck in airports, this would be no shock to you, but aparently i always
go through customs as well as have problem entering countries. Almost everytime i go into Montreal, i go through customs
and everytime i enter Egypt i get put in a holding room for about 15 minutes until they realize i am not the "Rami Boraie" they
are looking for. Anyways there i am with a big stupid smile on my face handing this guy my passport, I waited and waited and well
he kept looking closely at my picture, i realize hmm...i really don't look soo much like my passport. I take off my glasses and
mimick my stupid grin...they were still not impressed. the guy leaves his post and takes me too this area on the side.
I instantly think...freg They are rejecting me aren't they. I sat there for a good 30-45 mins and finally come to the realization
I am screwed aren't I. Almost every 5 minutes the guy with my passport would go from one room to another...I sit and wait
then finally a different guy comes gives me my passport and says "thanks for your co-operation." I am not sure what i was
Co-operating with but hey i am on my way. I get my bag, go make a gone for the nothing to declare line and pray no customs...
for the first time I win! i get out! and see my dad Right away. this is a first for not have to go through customs!
My parents pick me up and we go into the car with their driver and head home. The ride was amazing, I was constantly impressed
how it could go from crap to amazing architecture. I get to our appartment which is according to what i was told "the Most
expensive building in Ghang Zhou!" The building is stunning, simply put, red carpet entrance, ridiculous marble Foyer, awesome
elevators, betcha! I loved it, The view from here is pretty cool espicially at night.
I go unpack..then to be told don't bother the maid will tomorrow...hey i am a lazy bastard, so eff ya!
We eat dinner and then go for a walk with my mom's friend Josie, it was cool but awkward, how do i explain it. Let's just say the
first walk around china i would rather not spend with people i am just meeting. No one likes having to be entertaining while
taking in sights! Either way I was solid and had a good time, nice people, nice walk, sweet colours and lights!
I got home and CRASHED, we were supposed to go for a foot massage?!?! but hey look sleep was important.

Next mornin i awoke and found the house empty, not a sound, it took me forever to find a watch and I believe it's sad that I
didn't believe it was 8:15, simply because i believed it couldn't be nighttime...apparently mentally i forgot 8:15 am existed.
I sit down and go to read when i hear my dad wake up, and maid walk in through the door....I realize i wasn't alone and it really
was 8:15 am! My dad says he will be home at 12 and then we can go to the computer mall and a japanese restaurant. If you know
me two things i love Techy junk and Japanese food. 12 rolls around and off we went, me mom and dad to go grab some japanese food
Let's just say i ate more than enough Sashimi and Sushi and Tempura....I ate well! we head to the computer mall and well it was
nuts they sold fake i-pods that unless you really..REALLY know your shit, you couldn't tell the difference...I also Purchased a
120 gig memory stick...and it didn't work... I bought an adapter for my laptor tho, that was a must..because like an idiot, I
Forgot my ADAPTER!...let's just say i am known for breaking, losing, blowing up my laptop adapters! i believ this is number 4-5.
We hit up these malls for a good while and then finally headed home...Memory sticks didn't work. Adapter worked, mom bought a
fake i-pod, it works but i wouldn't use it....not by a long shot. That's it for now,
peace out!

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